TIME

2009... where does time go. i cant believe that i have a teenager, that my baby is in second grade and that i have been married almost (feb 1) 18 years. i cant believe that it was over two weeks ago when winter break started and now the kids are back into school. the 1st of the month always seems to be here to pay bills, months change, season change, life seems to be going so fast and i am realizing more and more that "life is vapor".

time... it seem like i am always fighting against time in one sense and trying to wait paitently for God's time in another sense.

For to him a thousand years are like a day.

2009 i want to be very aware of where my time is spent. time is something that we can never get back and it is a gift from God. What i do with my time i will be held accountable for.

the last two teachings on sunday have challenged me to be more about the Kingdom of God. a tell tale of where my heart is, is where i spent my time and energy.

hunger and thirst for righteousness - for theirs is the kingom of God

God's ways are amazing, His ways are true and good. I am total desperate to fall onto him and ride on his mercy and grace.

I want to make my home a place of security for kevin and the kids to come home to. i want time to sit at the feet of my saviour and know him more and pray on behalf of my family and others who need him. i want to be reminded every moment of my desperate state. i want to draw near to jesus so he will draw near to me. i want to meditate on his words and i want to memorize his promises. i want to draw out the noises of this world and chaos.

as i type i fight with the feelings of being very selfish. i know God wants - no he commands - that we go into the world proclaiming Jesus. But i am finding out that I cant proclaim until i am filled and my first place to proclaim my love for Jesus is to my family and then to the world. not the other way around.

time keeps ticking by, as i see how fast my kids are growing, as i am witnessing and realizing that the things i teach to my kids about life - the truths about this life and life eternal - is going quickly so quickly.. im so very proud of each of them. they have hearts softened to the things of the Kingdom by God's grace.

it may look a little bit different at my home than what is has... starting with me i want to hunger and thirst for righteousness, and i want kevin, sawyer,ally,brayden and logan to hunger and thirst for righteousness. it is saying no - to the things of the world that bid our time - and that is going to take leading and discernement from the Spirit - and it will be saying yes - to things that matter. if i am not teaching and living out what it looks like to live in the world but not of it - then where will my kids see it. everything is going fast - we live in a high speed, instant world - the faster and louder the better.

2009 - if anything can be said at the end of this year come what may - (and believe me there are some huge unknowns out there) - is that i/we have drawn closer to our loving Father and He has drawn close to us. Im claiming all 6 of us on this promise.

The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires or those who fear him and hears their cry and saves them. ps 145:18&19

The LORD is exalted for he dwells on high; he will fill Zion with justice and righteousness.
He will be the sure foundation for your times, a rich storage of salvation and wisdom and knowledge, the fear of the LORD is the key to this treasure. Is33:5&6

im starting with these two promises, ones that God continues to bring to mind. may i walk in obediance and somehow through His goodness look a little more like my Jesus. Be glorified Jesus in my life in my family. - I cant wait to see where the journey brings us this year.